Sunday, November 25, 2012

Slight Technical Difficulties with Close-ups of Tiny Taxidermy Pieces ...

The insomniac  would like to apologize for the tardiness of this week's post - apparently Macro Mode on the new camera does not work the same as Macro Mode on the old camera. And since this week's subject consists of very small pieces of taxidermy, it's not particularly effective when the photos are so blurry it's hard to make out what they actually are ...

Worse than usual photo.

You're intrigued now though,
aren't you?

Hopefully, with rather large coffee cup and camera instruction booklet in hand, the correct way to take a decent close-up photo will be revealed by day's end, at which time a proper post will be published. Hopefully.


... many hours later. This was how it was supposed to start: 

The cleansing of the Gothic Mansion in preparation for holiday company has begun, as there's nothing quite like the probable embarrassment of having one's guests discover cobwebs in the corners to provide the necessary incentive for a thorough cleaning job. Everything in the Mansion, including things stored under glass domes, are being given a good going over. And as the last three items in this particular collection have been sitting on the plant stand waiting to be added to their special dome for well over a year now, one felt that along with a good dusting of the dome, this might also be an excellent time not only to hang the remaining items but also take a few pictures while they're out. Because if you think the insomniac's  close-ups stink, you should see her attempts to take a photo of anything hidden behind glass.

This particular collection is, of course, the insomniac's favourite, and has been in the works for roughly four or five years now. Because nothing is glued in place inside the dome, it is quite difficult to incorporate new items and completely justifies one's procrastination in adding those final three pieces - as soon as the glass dome is removed, tree branches, moss, bird's eggs and all those little hanging taxidermy pieces have a tendency to project themselves clear across the room. The majority of the collection was purchased in Germany, and one believes they are worn on a chain across the front of lederhosen and has heard them referred to as Black Forest Hunting Relics or Charivari. 


Bird Head

Back of Bird Head


Really Excellent Teeth

Crow Claw

Bird Beak

More Teeth


And Again - More Teeth

A Different Crow Claw

Little Hoof


Bottom Left: Hinged Jaw with Teeth
It opens and closes. Sweet.

Permanent Display with
badger skull, horn handled knife,
spider & web, owl ornament, pipe.

Because the branches are close to full, the insomniac  has now declared this particular collection to be complete. Unless another fantastic hinged-jaw piece or a larger glass dome becomes available at a decent price, in which case there's probably room for a few more.

Until next time, the insomniac  wishes you nights of blissful sleep filled with pleasant dreams. Goodnight, my pretties.


PostScript: During proofreading, the spouse mentioned the pictures were very difficult to see, especially with all the tree branches, moss and bird's eggs in the way. Should you agree with him, you can always click on the pictures for a better look.

Sunday, November 18, 2012

It's Hard to Find a Decent Gothic Potholder These Days ...

Welcome to another edition of Crafting with the Insomniac - this week's post a result of the difficulties one has experienced in the past trying to find appealing kitchen linens for everyday use. Although such items can often be found during the Hallowe'en shopping season, they are generally of poor quality and sometimes border on the tasteless (as if that's ever been a deterrent). But as the current pair of damask oven mitts are ready for the bin, one thought to share a short tutorial this week on making your own - the hardest part of this project will be choosing the fabric.

The insomniac  opted for this one, which was brought to the attention of the “Ladies in Black” by Laura of Roses and Vellum. Which was very unselfish of her, because had the insomniac  been the one to discover it, she most likely would have kept that information to herself. A collage of skulls, ravens, toads, owls, bats and damask patterns, it has a little bit of everything the insomniac  loves. The fabric speaks to her, and what it appears to be saying is, “Five yards is not enough. Why did you only purchase five yards? What were you thinking?” Something along those lines anyway.

Michael Miller - Nevermore Collection

Your first order of business will be to find some insulated material. Unfortunately, you're on your own here, as one has absolutely no idea what this stuff is actually called. It is a quilted fabric with a silvery metallic heat-resistant outside and a cotton muslin inside.

Heat Resistant Side of Fabric
Cotton Muslin Side of Fabric

Now while you might be the kind of person who can pull things out of the oven with just one potholder, a dish towel, your shirt or whatever else is at hand, the insomniac  is not such a person. She requires two large oven mitts that go halfway up her forearm, so as to avoid the risk of charred flesh and possible damage to the tattoos. Should you also be such a person, please repeat the next three steps twice - once for each oven mitt. And if you're planning on making a simple round potholder, you probably don't need a tutorial and might want to skip ahead.

Cut out front and back of oven mitt
from the insulated material,
using this pattern.

Cut out front and back of oven mitt
from the fabric.

Baste fabric to insulated material, with
cotton muslin side of insulated material
on the inside of the oven mitt.

Rather than use a purchased bias tape to enclose the seams, today we'll be making our own using a handy little tool called, unsurprisingly, a Bias Tape Maker. Select a complementary fabric, perhaps something left over from a past project that isn't large enough to do much else with. One has chosen to make a one-inch bias tape to fit around the thickness of the oven mitt. The following instructions are very brief as, should you decide to purchase a Bias Tape Maker, much clearer instructions than the insomniac  could ever hope to provide will be included in the package.

Create the first 45° line.

Cut 2" wide strips.

Sew all the strips together.

Run fabric through the Bias Tape Maker.

Now you have, literally, miles
of bias tape for future projects.

Tape sewn onto the top of oven mitts.

Normally at this point, the oven mitts would be sewn wrong sides together and the exposed seams enclosed in more bias tape. But apparently a little bit of stripey accent goes a long way and adding even more stripey accents made it a bit too busy, even for the insomniac's  tastes. Which is odd considering her “tastes” are best described as completely over the top, bordering on the garish.

The mitts were sewn right sides together. While one had planned on neatly finishing the seams with the serger, it was protesting quite loudly about having to get through two layers of insulated material, so a simple straight seam with a zigzag stitch to finish off the edges was used instead. The second hardest part of the project was turning the oven mitt right side out - the handle of a wooden spoon helped push the thumb out quite nicely.

Messy inside sewing.
Nobody sees that part anyways ...

The last remaining pieces of the insulated material were used to create hot mats for the Dining Room Table. They, plus the new oven mitts, have been safely put away until the night before the Annual Christmas Potluck so as to remain in pristine condition until then.

Four hot mats are not enough. Why did you only make four hot mats?

Add bias tape loops if you like to hang your oven mitts.

Come the New Year, one already has plans for matching placemats, an apron and a tea cozy because (as you've probably already guessed) an additional six yards of fabric have been purchased. Which is the only reason the insomniac  has shared the fabric source, in a completely selfless manner just like Laura, because eleven yards might be enough. But just to be on the safe side, the Michael Miller rep was contacted this week ... is a $1000 minimum order a bit too much fabric, do you think? Quoth the raven, “Never! More!!”

Until next time, the insomniac  wishes you nights of blissful sleep filled with pleasant dreams. Goodnight, my pretties.


PostScript: The insomniac  was delighted at having made it through yet another year, celebrating her Fifty-Seventh birthday this week. Only three more years and she'll qualify for Senior Citizen Status; apparently she has already achieved Crone Status. Which evidently is not as insulting a comment as was first thought, when she was referred to as such recently ...

Thursday, November 15, 2012

CorpGoth's Mid-Month Status Report - Winter Wear

Trystan of CorpGoth's mid-month status report for November is “What do you wear to work in winter?” A work-appropriate winter coat has always been lacking in the insomniac's  wardrobe, and for many years she resorted to wearing a spring/fall coat padded with extra layers underneath for warmth; a fairly unattractive look, not unlike the Pillsbury Dough Boy or the Michelin Man. But one made do with this solution instead of spending hard-earned money on a coat that was merely adequate.

After many years searching for that elusive perfect coat, two seasons ago the insomniac  came across not one but two perfect coats in a small boutique in Berlin called Böhm-Mode. Everything in the store was handmade by the owner but, surprisingly, less than the price of a similar quality ready-to-wear coat here at home. This first coat was a case of love at first sight, and was available in every size except the insomniac's. The sales associate contacted the owner who offered to make the coat in the proper size. At 7:00 p.m. the following day, just before departing Berlin, the coat was picked up - the poor woman must have been sewing all night long! Because both coats are so well made and will probably last forever, added to the daily use they receive during the eight months of the year that can be classified as winter up here, they are a perfect example of Trystan's Cost per Wear theory.

This coat fills the gap in the wardrobe for a coat that's suitable for wear with a dress or skirt. It is made of heavy gabardine with a satin lining and is perfect for autumn. In winter, it can still be worn if one is walking from the heated house to the heated garage, driving to work in a heated vehicle, and not planning on spending longer than 15 minutes outside.

Scarf by Nile Clothing (or maybe Jackpot)
Antique Mourning Brooch

The collar turns into a hood of sorts ...

When the temperature drops below -20° C, and skirts and dresses have been abandoned for the extra warmth of jeggings or treggings or whatever it is they're called this year, this shorter wool jacket is worn with a wool scarf. Although you can bet it never looks this put together when it's thrown on in the morning, as the insomanic  rushes around the house trying to remember everything before flying out the door at the last possible second. The jacket came with a detachable velveteen hood which is seldom worn. Hair + Hood = Static.

Wool Jacket with Velveteen Trim
Wool Scarf by Savican 

With seldom worn hood ...

And on days when the thermometer reaches -25° C or even colder, the twelve year old black Roots down-filled parka with fur trimmed hood comes out no matter how awkward it looks with the outfit. Because at those temperatures, everyone  is scurrying to the nearest heated building and nobody  gives a rip about anyone else's outerwear, unless it's to notice with some degree of envy that it looks warmer than their own.

Thanks to Trystan for hosting the mid-month Status Report! See you at the regular 2:00 a.m. posting time Sunday for another edition of Crafting with the Insomniac, and this week's riveting post on ... potholders.

Until next time, the insomniac  wishes you nights of blissful sleep filled with pleasant dreams. Goodnight, my pretties.


Sunday, November 11, 2012

A Delightful Christmas Fruitcake Recipe

Despite Edward Gorey's feelings about it, there are those of us who actually look forward to the annual appearance of The Christmas Fruitcake. And during the cold and dismal month of January when there is little else to look forward to, a nice piece of leftover fruitcake, a Mandarin orange and a pot of Earl Grey tea will help make the month almost bearable.

Obviously, Mr. Gorey just never found
the right  fruitcake recipe ...

Now if your only experience with fruitcake is one that has come from a tin or a box, then yes, it undoubtedly deserves being tossed into a hole in the ice. The insomniac's  very own mother made hers from a mix, which required only the addition of a few eggs to the contents in order to become a perfect example of just such a fruitcake. The only reason it was included in her yearly Christmas baking repertory was to appease her father-in-law, who had emigrated to Canada from England but who retained his fondness for English fare. Every Sunday, for as long as he was able, Grandpa Smith would come for a traditional Sunday supper of Roast Beef and Yorkshire Pudding - the pudding never quite living up to his expectations. Mincemeat Tarts and Shortbread, his other favourites, are recipes which remain to this day in one's own recipe collection, although the insomniac  has managed to find a never-fail Yorkshire Pudding recipe with which to replace her Sainted Mother's.

Christmas dinner was always finished off with the Canadian prairie version of British plum pudding - steamed carrot pudding. The very thought of this pudding causes an involuntary gag reflex, and it's safe to say that particular recipe was not saved. Before completely writing off Christmas puddings altogether, the insomniac  contacted Alastair of App'y Talk to see if he might be able to suggest a good recipe. He was kind enough to supply the following, originally published in Michael Barry's “Radio Times” Cookery Year. Hopefully, one will manage to avoid burning the place to the ground when attempting to set the brandy-soaked pudding alight, providing some unexpected entertainment for the family on Christmas Day.

Click to enlarge.

The following recipe remains the constant favourite after many years of intensive Fruitcake Research, and came from a very old issue of Victoria Magazine. Clipped from that same issue were recipes for California Fruitcake and Canadian White Fruitcake, both equally delightful variations of the traditional dark. Email if you'd like a copy of either. It's always best to make fruitcake by the end of November at the very latest, as it needs a good 3 to 4 weeks of marinating in brandy-soaked cheesecloth before consumption. The insomniac  does not care for, and therefore never includes, the candied cherries in her fruitcake, and one year will attempt to make her own candied peel. But not this year.

Click to enlarge.

Marinating in the brandy.
Fa la la la la ...

Twice as much brandied fruit as batter.
... la la la la.

Two hours later.

Lying comatose in its brandy-soaked bedding.
Been there - done that, as they say.

Since the currants, raisins and mixed peel are already out, you might as well make some mincemeat. Again, if your only experience with this delicacy is a store-bought version, one can understand why you might be somewhat hesitant, but suggests you try this old family recipe in spite of your reservations. As there is only one individual in this household who actually enjoys Mincemeat Tarts at Christmas, this recipe is generally halved. It tastes just fine without the suet and, as does everything, improves with the addition of 2 to 3 tablespoons of brandy, whisky or rum.

Click to enlarge.

As with the fruitcake, the mincemeat should be allowed to mature a week or two before use. The Mincemeat Tarts are made with a shortcrust pastry from an out-of-print book of classic English recipes called Farmhouse Cookery, Recipes from the Country Kitchen. Custom has it that one tart should be eaten for each of the twelve days of Christmas to ensure twelve happy months ahead. No arguments here.

Numerous copies of this book have been
purchased for gift-giving over the years.
One has always had good luck finding them on eBay ...

Until next time, the insomniac  wishes you nights of blissful sleep filled with pleasant dreams, of Fruitcake and Mincement and whatever other traditional family favourites are on your Christmas baking list this year. Which obviously she would love to hear about, as there's always room on her personal baking list for new additions. Goodnight, my pretties.


PostScript: The shipment of Edward Gorey items did arrive this week, including the Fruitcake Holiday Cards (in case you find them just as amusing as the insomniac  does), Dracula Puzzles and Toy Theatres, Fantod Pack Tarot Cards, and some excellent seasonal reading entitled The Twelve Terrors of Christmas. And with the fruitcakes now done and 25 cm of snow this week so far, it is  beginning to feel a lot like Christmas around here. Yay!

Saturday, November 3, 2012

A Monthly Theme Post? About Hosiery??

This will be the insomniac's  first attempt at a Monthly Theme Post, but having been an admirer of VictorianKitty's blog Sophistiqué Noir since practically forever, she figured it was high time to finally have a go at it. The closest thing to an outfit post attempted thus far was when a few ancient articles of clothing were exhumed from the back of the closet, in a somewhat sorry attempt to explain the evolution of one's style.  Ha.

After viewing the other participants' posts showcasing their abundant Hosiery Collections, the insomniac  has come to the rather grim conclusion that she is completely out of her depth here. A fact made even more painfully apparent after viewing the beautiful and always exquisitely attired Ms. Kitty's hosiery post. One doubts Ms. Kitty ever rummages around in Mr. Kitty's thrift store donation bag for cast-off joggers and Harley t-shirts, searching for that perfect “lounging around the house” ensemble preferred by certain people.  Strictly hypothetically speaking, because obviously the insomniac  never does that. Rummage around in the spouse's donation bag, that is. And even if she did, there wouldn't be anything remotely resembling hosiery in there anyway.

The insomniac's  hosiery of choice (when employed), are black opaque cotton tights - not exactly Theme Post worthy. So here is a picture of her only pair of tights that are not black. They are grey and have skulls on them. There isn't much else one can think to say about the hosiery. Except they were a present from a friend. Which was very nice of her. Thanks, Di.

This is rather embarrassing for all of us, isn't it?

Next week, a return to more solid ground when hopefully the shipment of Edward Gorey items will have arrived, in which case there will be a post about Christmas Fruitcake; failing that, a post about Tastefully Decorating with Skulls. Either way, it's bound to be less awkward than this week's post. Ms. Kitty, if you'd prefer the insomniac  not participate in future Monthly Theme Posts, she completely understands.

Until next time, the insomniac  wishes you nights of blissful sleep filled with pleasant dreams. Provided you can manage to expunge that nightmarish image of skull-stockinged legs from your subconscious, that is. Goodnight, my pretties.


PostScript: Congratulations to Morgaine F., the winner of last week's Giveaway! Hopefully, Morgaine, you hadn't planned on using your $75 Gift Certificate towards a pair of tights, because Insomniac's Attic does not carry Hosiery. But please check out the other Theme Post participants, as they  had some excellent suggestions for places that do ...

After publishing this week's post, one realized her own Hosiery Collection needed a serious overhaul, prompting an outing to the lovely boutique where she used to work. Practically unheard of, to actually make it out the door with only one pair of purple lace tights and nothing else ...