Sunday, July 7, 2013

The Zombies are Coming! The Zombies are Coming!

A mere month after writing, one's worst nightmare of encountering a Horde of Zombies now seems inevitable. While not currently  inhabiting the abandoned building next door, the ravenous hordes will be out in full force on July 20th at Calgary's first 5 kilometre Zombie Survival Obstacle Race. Although the insomniac  herself won't be attempting to elude the bloodthirsty throngs while trying to negotiate a course filled with mud, water and obstacles (one suspects even a zombie prefers a bit  of a challenge from its prey), she is eager to observe how the other 2500 participants manage to avoid being consumed by legions of the living dead. For future reference, you understand ...

The event is being held at the Cochrane Agricultural Society Grounds, a mere 15-minute drive (roughly a 4-day lurch) from our temporary home in The Spooky Forest. A little too close for comfort.


Being renowned for her Creative Gift Basketry Skills, the insomniac  volunteered to make another for this event. Having learned a few important lessons from her previous effort, it went much smoother this time around. Still, at the end, cellophane was all that was available, ensuring the contents of this gift basket are no more visible than they were in the last one. 

Raffle tickets for this and various other prizes can be purchased at the event; all proceeds being donated to Kids Cancer Care, the charity of choice for the 2013 Zombie Survivor Event.

There might  be some tasty brains in those little cement heads ...

Although the very idea of 200 zombies should be enough to give any sensible person pause, the insomniac  plans to squelch her unease by methodically working her way through the medley of offerings from the various food trucks who will be in attendance, and who apparently have no qualms whatsoever about attending a function with so many of the undead. None of the mobile eateries appear to have brains on the menu though, so there probably won't be much of a lineup. *

Should that prove ineffective, the plan is to then proceed to the End of the World Party (and the beer gardens), and share a cold one while having a heart-to-heart with whomsoever is in charge of the Undead Horde, in hopes of convincing him/her/it that the abandoned building on the neighbouring property really wouldn't be all that suitable for their next base camp once the race is finished, and really isn't worth the 4-day stagger to check it out. And should that not end well, the final plan is to slip away before nightfall and commence construction of very high barricade around the trailer.

For more details, visit the Zombie Survivor Calgary Website and Facebook Page. Other than the zombies, it promises to be a fun event.


Until next time, the insomniac  wishes you nights of blissful sleep filled with pleasant dreams. Depending on how much shut-eye she manages to get the night before, it might be difficult to distinguish her from the rest of the stumbling horde. Goodnight, my pretties.

IA


* When you think about it, the 2500 participants are sort of a mobile eatery themselves, aren't they?

32 comments:

  1. Oh, that has to be the most gorgeous gift basket I've ever seen! ❤ It's wonderful that this zombierrific event will be supporting such a great cause!

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    1. Thank you, Little Gothic Horrors! Good thing you didn't see the basket AFTER the cellophane treatment! Hopefully, zombie aficionados appreciate Gothic Home Decor as much as the rest of us, because it really is for a wonderful cause.

      And despite her misgivings about the whole thing, the insomniac  is looking forward to the event and will hopefully get lots of amazing pictures! So she probably shouldn't visit the beer gardens until after the race ... ;o)

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  2. The Zombie event sounds so cool! What an idea, and also for a good cause. Stay safe there, Insomniac! Have good dreams.

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    1. It should be fun, shouldn't it, Hindustanka? Shouldn't it? Yes, it will probably be loads of fun. And it is a brilliant idea, especially the inclusion of an obstacle course.

      The insomniac  will, of course, stay safe, even if she has to push someone else in front of an oncoming zombie to save herself. Nah, just kidding. She'd never do that. ;o)

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  3. I love the basket! I don't know how I missed the previous gift basket post. Both baskets are gorgeous and both posts are hilarious! I love your blog so much, Insomniac! Your writing is wonderful and the posts so humorous.

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    1. LOL, everything you'll ever need to know on how NOT to create a gift basket!

      Awww, that's so sweet of you to say, lightning x ... seriously, the insomniac  is THRILLED you love her blog that much and think her posts are hilarious. The good news is that even if she does have a few too many beers, trips and falls in front of a zombie and ends up with half her brain eaten, there probably won't be any detectable difference in her writing. Most days she only functions with half a brain, anyway. ;P

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  4. This looks AWESOME!!! And for a fabulous cause! I'd be there in a "brain beat" .... mwhahahaha.

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    1. A brain beat - that's a good one, Professor! LOL

      On a serious note, you and your mother are in the insomniac's thoughts daily. She wishes you much love and strength during this difficult time. Take good care of the both of you. ❤

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  5. Can you imagine the insurance they need to turn a bunch of zombies loose? I certainly hope they are the slow ones and not fast ones, or else that 4 day stagger may turn into a 4 minute mile . . . Cannot wait to hear an update on the cottage!

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    1. Good heavens, the insomniac  never even gave a thought to the insurance angle. You're right, Mayfair Mistress - the cost of insurance is probably even more horrifying than 200 zombies! Do you happen to work in the insurance business? :D

      There are fast zombies? Apparently, one needs to upgrade their zombie knowledge, obtained primarily from watching Night of the Living Dead. Those guys were sloo-o-ooow!

      Oh, a cottage update. Wouldn't that be wonderful? Currently bogged down in the county office, trying to get the Development Permit approved. Apparently there are issues ... Pfffft.

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  6. And to think that we were concerned with cougars and bears while a ravenous horde of zombies was approaching all the while! Seriously though, it looks like Halloween has come early to Calgary and it should be a good time. I love the gift basket and it appears more than suitable for the event. Hopefully, you'll be able to stay away from the beer garden long enough to get some photos you can share with us.

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    1. Seriously, isn't that the way it always goes? Worry about one thing only to be blind-sided by something totally unexpected, right? Well, it was kind of expected, but still ...

      The insomniac  promises to stay away from the beer garden long enough to get at least one good picture, Nightwind. But that's all she promises. While all the zombies are stumbling around moaning “Brains...” she plans on stumbling around moaning “Beer...”. Do the undead make good designated drivers, do you think? ;o)

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    2. I suspect that Mr. Insomniac might make a better designated driver than the zombies. He might not appreciate my saying that though. Have fun!

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  7. beer gardens make everything better

    maybe offer a basket to the good folks in the zoning office?
    good luck

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    1. All is right with the world when there's a beer garden involved. ;o)

      Excellent idea to offer a bribe - oops, gift basket - to the zoning office staff, tess! :D

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  8. That event seems like a lot of fun!! :D Perfect giftbasket!

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    1. Doesn't it, Lesthi? Especially that the 2500 runners have to work their way through an obstacle course - that should be exciting! :D

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  9. This definitely sounds different from other zombie walks I've heard of. I would love to see pictures, but at the same time I would probably also stay clear of them...
    I love your sinister gift basket!

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    1. Thank you, Ms. Misantropia!

      And yes, there WILL be pictures, but the insomniac  has no intention of getting any closer than arm's reach. Good thing the camera has zoom! LOL

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  10. It sounds like a lovely event, even though I would always make sure to have enough raw meat on me to distract the zombies and get away, if neccessary, if I were anywhere near it.

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    1. Ooooh, good idea, Margaret! The insomniac  will have to rig up some sort of Ziploc baggie necklace with raw hamburger in it. Thanks for the suggestion!

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  11. What a fun event. I like public parties with an element of creativity and this has that.

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    1. Although the insomniac  doesn't really keep abreast of current Zombie Events (being more a fan of Vampires and Ghosts than the Undead), it does seem as though the obstacle course aspect is quite unique. And the three young men who are organizing it have done a remarkable job getting this much participation for their first year. It promises to be a good time - and the food and beer gardens don't hurt, either! ;o)

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  12. Eerily fabulous creation! Props to whoever came up with this idea - it's certainly leagues upon leagues more creative and off-the-(mausoleum)wall than most community events. Like yourself, I wouldn't participate as an entrant, but I'd certainly enjoy seeing it (after all, who doesn't feel like a zombie sometimes when summer's heat is at its most brutal?).

    ♥ Jessica

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    1. Thank you, Jessica!

      Since the weather forecast suggests it's going to be somewhere between 26-28°C on Saturday (which one realizes is nowhere near what you're suffering through but is still far too hot for the insomniac's  liking), one suspects we'll all be feeling like zombies whether we're participating in the event or not. Thank goodness there will be cold beer! Not that one is looking forward to that more than the actual race or anything ... ;o)

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  13. I've seen promotions for these type of runs elsewhere. Looks like great fun, if your into heatstroke for a good cause. Me, I'd just lob a few loonies into the collection bucket, then observe from the shade. And remember, I don't have to outrun the zombies, I just have to outrun you!

    Ali

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    1. Not a tree anywhere near the Cochrane AG grounds, Ali! Hopefully there's umbrellas in the beer gardens! Avoiding heatstroke is exactly why the insomniac  chose to donate a gift basket instead of running herself - no physical exertion involved in that whatsoever!

      Gasp! Surely you wouldn't consider sacrificing the insomniac  to save your own skin?

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  14. Oooh... that's awesome... A Zombie Survival race... that's funny... I don't like Zombies so much... they always want brains and moan and don't look pretty... but a race with them... that's funny...

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    1. Looking forward to watching the race tomorrow, Madame Kismet! Hopefully, at least a few of the pictures will turn out. Apparently there will be both fast and slow Zombies. Might have to stick to photos of the slow ones so the pics aren't blurred!

      The insomniac  isn't that crazy about Zombies, either - she much prefers Vampires!

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  15. Agree - vampires over zombies any day! ;)

    What's with this new Food Truck craze? I have yet to partake, but I see such events cropping up around my area constantly now. Gourmet, they claim.... I'll have to use a cheat day to find out next time I have the chance!

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    1. Vampires are way sexier than Zombies, hands down!

      Right? They even have programs on TV about the food truck thing!? So we did try one out, but it was very healthy and therefore not all that exciting. Felafel chips and hummus. Boring. You probably wouldn't even need to use a cheat day for that, Ms. Kitty. But if you're going to use up a cheat day, you might as well go all out and really make it worthwhile! Triple-decker pulled pork with deep fried pickles or something. :D

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