Friday, August 8, 2014

Horror Con 2014 or Your Money's No Good Here, Mrs. Insomniac ...

Having not done a trade show of any kind for roughly fourteen years now (because THAT statement doesn't make the insomniac  feel as old as dirt), she decided to apply for a couple of local juried markets this past spring and was advised she didn't quite meet the criteria. “Please don't look too closely at the website.”, she pleaded. “I'll only bring items that fit in with the Shabby Vintage vibe you're going for. The stuff on the website is more for those with a darker aesthetic. I promise I won't bring any taxidermy or skulls.” And yet, despite her grovelling and pathetic attempt to fit in, the answer remained an unequivocal NO, thank you!! But please feel free to try again next year. Smiley face.

Then, at the end of April when it was time to have the winter tires removed from her vehicle, the service technician suggested Calgary Horror Con might be a good fit for Insomniac's Attic. And remembering the organizers of the Zombie Survivor Run had suggested the very same thing last year, the insomniac  had an epiphany of sorts ... maybe  she should apply for a spot at Horror Con. The phrase “Not too quick on the uptake” immediately springs to mind ...

And Dan Doherty, CEO and Founder of Horror Con, felt it might be a good fit as well. And so it came to pass - last weekend the insomniac  had the pleasure of being one of the vendors, and also managed to browbeat the youngest into helping by forcing her to book time off from her paying jobs to assist her Sainted Mother with one that didn't. Pay, that is.

Upon arriving at the Clarion Hotel Friday evening to set up, it was a thrill to park one's little wannabe hearse next to five real ones, and was the first indication the insomniac  had been accepted at a venue that was, indeed, right up her alley.

When the HHR finally craps out,
the next vehicle is definitely gonna be a hearse ...

Although by the time that sturdy little HHR dies,
its owner may have also expired ...

After having given up working on the tiny tablet, the website has been sadly neglected for the past three and a half months, and many of the products shown are not available online yet. Only another one (or maybe two) months and the Little Gothic Cottage should be ready, at which time all shall be put in order ... our lives included.

One definitely overestimated how much a 4x8 table actually holds ...

... explaining the number of completely unpacked boxes beneath the table.

At this point, the insomniac  - who was absolutely positive she'd gotten enough acceptable photos and videos to write this post but who really hadn't - would like to thank Lee Kempster of   ilikebadmovies  for graciously allowing her to use some of his. All the Really Good pictures are the property of Lee and do not bear the IA watermark, in case you're having difficulty determining which ones belong to whom. And if you've been reading this blog for any length of time, you probably wouldn't.

The insomniac  arrived at the event bright and early Saturday morning, giddy with excitement and more than a little apprehensive at being around that many people all at once. The youngest straggled in roughly two hours later; rightfully so, as she'd worked until 4:00 a.m.

It was ill-advised to lower one's head for even a second, whether to look for more items to add to the table or check one's iPhone for messages, for fear of being confronted by something horrific when one finally came up for air.

The youngest said these two were from Silent Hill.

Yet another movie the insomniac  wasn't able to watch all the way through ...

He seems blissfully unaware he has not just one but TWO
Vicious Predators looking over his shoulders ...

Eeeep!

 Eeeeeeeeeep!!

There were some really excellent costumes ...

Our table was directly across from Joseph Turkel, Lynn Lowry and Tony Moran. Mr. Turkel was a warm and funny man who spent a great deal of time talking with each individual who approached his table; Ms. Lowry was a soft-spoken woman who kindly came over and introduced herself, as the insomniac  was too shy to approach her; and Mr. Moran kept us entertained all weekend by making amusing faces and going outside for a smoke with the youngest when she got bored.

It was an honour to be seated near these famous actors, and to witness just how much they enjoyed interacting with their fans ...

Tony Moran interacting with fan ...


Lynn Lowry and crazed fans with very bad dental hygiene ...

Joseph Turkel being utterly charming ...

Lloyd Kaufman being frightened by a really scary guy with a mop ...

Because she felt somewhat guilty about dragging the youngest out of bed so early, she purchased an autographed picture and photo for her.


She's pleased with the autograph ...

... perhaps not so much with the photo. Try and guess who took that one.

Down the aisle from us was Gory Props, who kept us on the edge of our seats all weekend. On Saturday with this gentleman, who tirelessly flung himself from his coffin every five minutes:


On Sunday with this gentleman, who died a rather energetic death. Over. And over. And. Over.


And the insomniac's  personal favourite, the Grim Reaper of Death and Pestilence and Mayhem and Destruction. Although one might have gotten his name slightly wrong as we were never formally introduced - he always being rather preoccupied with either the pretty nurse or the pretty clown.


He looks pretty happy for a Grim Reaper of Death and
Pestilence and Mayhem and Destruction, doesn't he?

Over the weekend, the insomniac did manage to sneak in a few purchases of her own. Although there were many things that could have come to live with us in our hotel room, the words of the eldest from just a few weeks' previous kept echoing in her head (Now that you're getting ready to move into your new house, please don't start hoarding again, Mum.) and so she kept them to a minimum.

Still, it's always a good idea to stock up on black t-shirts
whenever an opportunity presents itself ...

Simply because she lives in a world of men with “epic” beards.

And because Mammoth Beard Co.
It's funny.

Who could resist having a copy of this amazing print by
Nat Jones hanging in their new sewing room.

And who, in turn, purchased a cobweb pin and Memento Mori
beer opener from the insomniac's  table ...

Fortunately she never saw this, or the wise words of her eldest
would likely have flown right out of her head ...

There were a few sad moments ... even though it's quite evident Steve's new owner will love him just as much as the insomniac  did, it was a bittersweet sale. Further proof one shouldn't become too attached to one's taxidermy.

Goodbye, Steve!

** sniff sniff **

And because she kept waffling about whether to purchase a picture of  Mr. Turkel as Lloyd the Bartender in The Shining, autographed with “Your money is no good here, Mrs. Insomniac. Orders of the house.” by the time she finally decided to ignore the words of the eldest and add just one more item to her purchases, the show was over and it was too late.

Despite these two tiny regrets, Horror Con 2014 was a perfect weekend, and one is quite sure she never would have heard either of the following statements uttered at any of the Shabby Vintage markets, had she even been accepted:

1. I ADORE taxidermy!
2. This would look FABULOUS in my hearse.

As she was packing up at the end of the show, one of the Gory Props guys asked, “Are you going to Comic Con next month?” And for someone who has a hard time dealing with more than five people at one time, the thought of a convention with close to 100,000 in attendance was almost enough to induce heart failure.

Perhaps the possibility of having a hearse of one's own isn't so far-fetched after all ...

Until next time, the insomniac  wishes you nights of blissful sleep filled with pleasant dreams. Goodnight, my pretties.

IA

44 comments:

  1. This post kept me laughing the entire way through (I mean it as a compliment). And, Insomniac, please do try again next year (smiley face)...

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    1. Oh thank you, Variations on Light! I'm glad it made you laugh! :D

      And um, nope ... not gonna try again. Being turned down for those markets brought back some extremely vivid memories of being shunned by the popular gurls all through school. It felt like I was fifteen again, for heaven's sakes. Pffft. Smiley face.

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  2. So nice that you had great time in Horror con and that you wrote about it in this blog! I've missed your lively and lovely way of writing! :D

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    1. It was a lot of fun, Jade - I really should get out more often! And you are so sweet ... ❤

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  3. Gawd, I would have been tempted to buy Steve the Jackalope myself. My sister once had a stuffed muskrat who wore a little Mexican sombrero on its head. There's just SOMETHING about taxidermy! Who can resist it? Loved this whole post, LOL -- especially that shot of all the hearses lined up. Some good cosplay there too!

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    1. A sombrero? Genius, Debra! LOL

      I just saw a taxidermy vignette on eBay involving two teensy bottles of Corona and a passed-out toad on the floor under the table with another toad's foot on his chest. I almost bid on it, but then I came to my senses. ;)

      Those hearses are cool, aren't they? Somebody told me they were from Edmonton - the Bonewagons or something?

      How's the new apartment? You liking it? :)

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  4. I'm glad you got to set up at the Horror Con. I suspect you've found a home there.

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    1. I think you may be right, Nightwind! It was perfect. Not too big that I got overwhelmed by the crowds but busy enough that there were lots of interesting people to talk to. :)

      Been thinking about your coat lately. I think I will be sewing on the dining room table for a few years. :)

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  5. Oh wow that looks like an amazing event and your stall looks so good. I'd definitely have spent a fortune there! :-)

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    1. Awww thanks, Rachel! In retrospect, I should have set up a mock table first so it didn't take me so long to set up Friday night, and perhaps I wouldn't have overpacked as much as I did. Ah well, I'll try to remember that next year! :)

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  6. How FABULOUS!!! Love this post, love your table, love your tales of HorrorCon! This is something I'd love to have gone to, although I'm honestly not much into gore. But all that Grim Reaper stuff is soooo tempting!

    And I'm so glad to see another post from you at last... :)

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    1. The youngest and I had a really good time, Lucretia! Good thing she was there so she could tell me what movie most of the costumes were from, because I can hardly ever make it through a horror movie right 'til the end. Usually too much gore for me, too!

      I do miss blogging (and thank you for the letter which I got yesterday, BTW!) but fall is swiftly approaching and I have to get the exterior painting done before it starts freezing at night. And then I need to get inside and start the varnishing! The end is in sight and I cannot begin to tell you how happy I'll be to not have to live out of a suitcase anymore. Except we still will be because we can't afford to get the walk-in closet done. LOL

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    2. So get some nice clothes racks until you can get the closet done! They come in VERY handy for lots of things, and are easy to store when not needed. Then you can put the suitcases AWAY... :-)

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    3. I can use the cardboard wardrobe boxes the moving company provided us with for storage. And it's not like we'll have a lack of boxes to store things in after we unpack, Lucretia! LOL

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  7. I am so excited to see you posting again!
    It's really great that you had fun, I see that Horror Con is gaining much popularity-- I attended their first annual event as a vendor once upon a time. It wasn't much then, a little trickle of people here and then with no big names like Tony Moran! How awesome, I do hope you'll go back, because your wares are definitely the best when it comes to dark and delightful ;)

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    1. Thank you, Madame MM! It might be a while before anything exciting enough to write about happens again though! Maybe I could do a post about all the action that occurs out on the street once the hotel's saloon doors close at 2:00 a.m., and that I'm lying awake listening to right now. It's pretty ... uhmmm ... interesting. ;)

      I didn't hear anything about the number of people who attended this year, but it was good to start out with a smaller market, I think. Comic Con just sounds too overwhelming for me, but who knows. Maybe I'll “grow a pair” as they say, and try for it next spring! Did you ever do that one?

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  8. Oh wow, it looks and sounds like you had a wonderful time - with people just like you (instead of non-inclusive shabby bitches). What a beautiful table you put up, no wonder they want you at the other fair. You should totally go!

    I'm not into taxidermy but Steve is just magical. Lucky guy for snatching him up! And your own purchase, the winged cat print, is something I'd love on any wall.

    It's really nice to see you back in the blogosphere, Ms Insomniac! And I'm looking forward to the updates on your house.

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    1. It was fabulous, Ms. Misantropia! I'd definitely do it again next year. And if I work up the nerve, maybe I'll do Comic Con, too. :)

      That print made me think of you ... I don't know why. ;)

      Only back in the blogosphere for a short time and then I'll probably be absent again for a while. Painting, varnishing and then finally moving in - woot! Then I'll have to get the whole internet thing figured out once we get settled. I can hardly wait to sleep in my own bed again. :)

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  9. I loved absolutely everything about this post Insomniac, not least of which is the fact that you are back here blogging! It is lovely to hear from you again!

    I share your love of taxidermy, hearses and horror movies so as much as I wish I could have attended Calgary Horror Con this year, I got a great deal of vicarious pleasure from reading (and seeing) the details of your wonderful weekend there! And I think that photo you snapped of your daughter with Tony Moran is rather fab ;)

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    1. Oh thank you, Gothic Flamingo! That's so sweet of you to say! I miss blogging and having the time to read blogs, too. Hopefully in a few more months, life will be back to normal and I can start catching up with everyone again! :)

      Horror Con was great and I hope I can do it again next year. The youngest said she's happy with her pic, even though I managed to cut most of her off! Unlike her mother, she's very photogenic. ;)

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  10. OMG! I wish I had been there... it looks so fantastic... *sigh*...

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    1. It was great, Madame Kismet! Do you have any Horror or Comic Conventions over there? :)

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  11. This looks like so much fun! You were so fortunate! :)

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    1. It was a blast, Ellone! And now I can hardly wait for next year! :)

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  12. What a great weekend you had! I'm sure that your table was a welcome part of the Horror Con. It must be great to see a parkinglot full of hearses :)

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    1. I hope they were happy to have me, linnea-marie; I'd love to go back next year. And it was great to be in a parking lot with that many hearses! LOL

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  13. Hello, long time no read. I hope you've been well and you're all excited to me moving into your beautiful Gothic mansion soon. I really wish we had Horror Con down this neck of the woods...perhaps I should organise my own.

    Your table looks absolutely amazing, you have so many gorgeous things for sale. I'd be unable to part with a single thing of course, and I'm sure Steve will be happy in his new home :)

    I'm still chuckling at this.....

    "And one is quite sure she never would have heard either of the following statements uttered at any of the Shabby Vintage markets, had she even been accepted:

    1. I ADORE taxidermy!
    2. This would look FABULOUS in my hearse."

    It's truly lovely to see you back in blogland, and with such a wonderfully creepy post too. Enjoy your week <3

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    1. I know, it's been a while, hasn't it, Yvonne! I'm doing good and now getting busy with varnishing and painting before the weather turns cold. We should be moving in within a month, all being well!

      Maybe now that you're not doing the faires you could organize a Horror Con ... that would be exciting but a lot of work, I think. I know Steve's new owner was really happy with him, so that makes me happy too. I do have to thin out the taxidermy collection sometime! ** hears voice of the eldest echoing in her head **

      It felt good to write a post, but now I'll probably be silent again for a while until after we've moved in. There's so much to try and get finished, but I can't tell you how thrilled I'll be to have a home again. You have a wonderful week too, Yvonne! ❤

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  14. Oh if I was there, I would have had an awfully difficult time trying to decide what to purchase from your venue...I want it all damn it! lol! Great stuff, especially the skulls and the Bela Lugosi mug :) ...and to be around that many hearses, well, that would make me one happy girl, envious, but happy. We have our own little wanna be hearse, a wee black Toyoto Yaris,lol...gonna get the real deal one day I hope...more than a few of us darklings who want one eh? ;) Thanks for posting about your time there, just wish I could have be there too!

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    1. LOL, when I looked at it all spread out on the table like that, there were a couple of things I was tempted to keep for myself, blackhrtgurl! I had to reorder the framed sacred heart, I'm afraid. One for me ... one for the store. :)

      Yes, I think we all want hearses but I doubt I'm ever going to be able to afford one! Plus, I think I would have a real hard time parking it. :P

      And I wish you could have been there, too!

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  15. Laughed out loud at the "Grim Reaper of Death and Pestilence and Mayhem and Destruction" having a sly grope of the naughty nurse. And I absolutely LOVE the print of the bat-cat sitting atop a mound of skulls!!

    Shabby Vintage markets don't deserve you! Yay for Horror Con!!!

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    1. A sly grope - that's a nice way to put it, Little Gothic Horrors! We call it “copping a feel” over here. ;)

      Isn't that a great print? it caught my eye immediately! And what a nice guy he was, too. P.S. I think I'm done with Shabby Markets. I know they'd pale in comparison to this one! :)

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  16. Wooooow! :O I would probably walk around with my jaw at the floor, all day. This is amazing! :D
    It looks like Steve got in the hands of a nice, new owner, dont worry. ;)
    Even though black cats are scary - I love it! I'd like to see it up on your wall later.

    And welcome back! I've missed your posts! ;D

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    1. I know you like horror movies, Sandra - you'd probably have been able to tell where all the costumes were from, unlike me! And Steve's owner seemed like a really nice guy - I'm not worried. Much. LOL

      It might be a while before you see the print on my sewing room wall. I think it might be a few years before we can afford to finish off that space above the garage. Oh well, maybe he'll go in a bedroom before then!

      Thanks! I've missed reading everyone's posts except for the occasional time I'm on the internet, too! :D

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  17. Hello there! and what a brilliant post! there is so much to love here! I loved the advice you were given about not lowering your head for a second, blooming good advice, the costumes were fantastically excellent......and very scary! a fine selection of hearses too, the 'LASRYDE' licence plate is brilliant, my middle daughter would love everything here too! 2 months to go to the Little Gothic Cottage too, I hope it's all going along swimmingly (I'm off to grab middle daughter now to read the post!) x x x

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    1. Hello, Peaches and thank you! There were a couple of costumes that were so gory I had to turn my head every time they walked by ... but that made the costume-wearers very happy! LASRYDE is a funny one and today at lunch when I was telling the carpenters about it, one said he'd seen a license plate on a hearse that read STIFFY. That might be even funnier. ;)

      Hope all is well with you and your family! I hope to eventually have time to get caught up on everyone's lives here very soon. ❤

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  18. Yep! she loved it and your blog! x x x

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    1. Awwww, that's so sweet - tell her thanks from me, please! :D

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  19. Hadn't heard from you in so long... Welcome back! As usual, enjoyed every word of your story! The horror genre folks are an eclectic bunch of folks. Sounds like it was a great experience! Hope your new home is coming along well!

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    1. I know ... it seems as though I've been gone forever to me too, Mark! And thanks!

      I really enjoyed myself at Horror Con, and I wish it weren't another whole year until the next one. They are hosting a Hallowe'en party - maybe I'll go to that! LOL

      Last month I was hoping we'd be in by now. This month I'm hoping we'll be in by the end of September. Maybe Hallowe'en? Christmas? :P

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  20. The only TRULY Scary thing for me was YOU applying for a Shabby Spot at a Juried Yawnfest of a Trade Show! *Winks* Much more pleased to see you surrounded by Our Type of Peeps at a much better venue... and your wanna-be-hearse parked beside the real deal made me LMAO... great way to end the evening, I almost spilled me drink on the keyboard! So glad this was a Huge success and much more sensible placement of your Fab Aesthetic. Blessings from the Arizona Desert... Dawn... The Bohemian

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    1. I know, Dawn ... WHAT WAS I THINKING!! And I snorted at your phrase Juried Yawnfest! I must remember that the next time I feel as though I should try to fit in with the local businesses. I'm actually very glad I wasn't accepted ... I think I would have felt extremely out of place and probably would have felt like crying. I guess those long-buried feelings of being the 'unpopular girl' never really do go away... LOL

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  21. Awesome post !! :)

    Best regards. D

    http://acontarvindodoceu.blogspot.pt

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