Sunday, April 8, 2012

Happy Easter! A Photo Album of the Crucifixion

This being Easter week, a short reflection on the crucifixion seemed to be just the ticket. The insomniac, despite not having attended a church service in years, does gather great comfort from the teachings and included on every yearly vacation itinerary (besides the compulsory visits to the most popular cemeteries) are tours of as many churches and cathedrals as possible. Lamentably, the insomniac's  long-suffering spouse does not share her enthusiasm and will submit to, at the very most, two of these church tours per trip, thereby spending a substantial amount of time waiting patiently outside while the insomniac  tries to capture a few decent photos in gloomy church interiors. Due to the substandard quality of the current point-and-shoot camera, one can well imagine how this could consume a great deal of time. Long-suffering and perhaps even a candidate for sainthood ...

The astute reader will recognize a different version
of this photo from the insomniac's first post.

Sorry for the repetition, but it is an all-time favourite ...

Cemetery, Sedlec Ossuary, Czech Republic

Perhaps if anyone out there is knowledgeable about such matters, they might offer a suggestion for a better alternative to the point-and-shoot. Not to mention that the purchase of a new camera would give the insomniac  a perfect excuse to revisit Every Single Place She's Ever Been in order to retake all the pictures properly. Which couldn't possibly be construed as compulsive behaviour, could it?

And as an additional bonus, a good quality camera would eliminate the excessive Photoshopping that is required before posting, as is perfectly exhibited in this next picture where most of the facial detail is lost and no amount of mucking about with Brightness or Contrast or Shadows seemed to improve it. Normally, a photo as poorly done as this would simply be eliminated, but the angel's pose in the rear struck the insomniac  as quite humorous. Not that one is implying there's anything even remotely funny about being crucified.

Charles Bridge, Prague

From the pose, one fancies the standing figure
is saying, “Oh dear.” 

Not being fluent in anything other than English definitely poses a problem when trying to acquire any sort of factual information about the subject one is trying to capture. Which is why one is quite mystified as to the reason that Christ's face is black but the rest of his body chalk white in this next photo. One could probably resort to Google for the answer but the insomniac  is rather lazy about that sort of thing, much preferring to fabricate her own stories than make any effort to get the actual facts. One simply has to hope that whomever one is fabricating the story for is just as much in the dark about the subject matter, thereby avoiding a potentially awkward situation.

Name of the church is lost in the murky depths of
the insomniac's
  mind, but definitely in Krakow, Poland ...

Same church in Krakow ...

The following photos are from the Asamkirche in Munich, Germany. According to the guide books, “this 18th century Baroque church leaves no surface unadorned” and was built by the Asam brothers who obviously felt that ostentatiousness was next to godliness. Even the insomniac's  spouse agreed it was worth a trip inside and those words, uttered from his mouth, are quite the endorsement. One has to look very closely above the round window to actually pick out the cross in this photo, being that the guide books are dead-on and there really are no unadorned surfaces, anywhere.

Asamkirche, Munich

One confessional is wrapped in a gilded snake (apparently symbolizing sinfulness), the second has a winged skull, and a third has a gilded laurel wreath representing saintliness, which the insomniac  didn't even bother to take a picture of since there were no skulls involved. This is, after all, the blog of an Elder Darkly Inclined Person, or Elder DIP if you will, although one has doubts that acronym will catch on anytime soon.

Confessional I
Confessional III
Confessional II

Lest you feel the insomniac  has an overabundance of vacation crucifixion photos, wait 'til she posts her photo albums of Madonnas, Gaudily Dressed Skeletal Remains of Saints and her all-time favourite photo subject, Cemeteries. A mistake generally made only once by an unsuspecting friend is to ask the insomniac  to share pictures of the latest trip.

Practically 100% sure this is in Nürnberg, Germany ...

Pietà - honestly, can't remember which church in Munich ...

Extremely fond of the skull and snake in this next photo; not so enamored with the flags, spotlight and address signs, the removal of which was well beyond one's editing skills.

Hdracany District, Prague

To end, a more pleasant image - minus the graffiti, which was Photoshopped out. Peace be with you this Easter, dear reader.

Bratislava, Slovakia

Until next time, the insomniac  wishes you nights of blissful sleep filled with pleasant dreams ... and for your bedtime reading enjoyment, might the insomniac  be so bold as to highly recommend the book “Lamb - The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal” by Christopher Moore, a suitably appropriate read for this Easter week. Goodnight, my pretties.


PostScript: The insomniac  sincerely hopes somebody out there is actually reading these posts (somebody other than her long-suffering spouse, family and close friends, that is). The statistics say there are actually hundreds of you, but the lack of comments would suggest otherwise. An observation of any sort would bring about great jubilation in the Gothic Mansion, even if it's along the lines of  “Quit writing such drivel - you're wasting our time. You suck.” Thank you.


  1. I'd love to know how you get the opportunity to travel so often! I have family in the Netherlands, and I just visited there for the first time in probably 20 years. Did you get to travel this much when your children were in high school? I haven't gone overseas more than a few times since the kids have been born. I'm hoping there's more travel in my future!

    1. We couldn't afford to travel except to the province next door for most of our lives AC (After Children), other than one major trip to Disneyland when we rented our old house to a movie company and used the money to finance it. After my mother died, there was an inheritance and we did a lot of traveling then!! I'd love to do more too, but now that we're both retired it once again has become short trips to the province next door. Although I did get a job of sorts last year, and I'm taking our youngest to NYC on Thursday with my savings! :D